Will We Ever See a Roundhouse? UAMC Reviews ‘Walker’ Episode 3

The answer is a “no” from Chuck Norris, which I’m sure he seems to have approved of.

After watching and reviewing the first two episodes of Walker, the restart of Texas Ranger – which, again, is just Walker, airs on the CW, and does not feature Chuck Norris – I finally did a little more research. First, the show is clearly a success. We’re talking about the first two episodes, both of which have been viewed more than 2 million times (on TV or on the same day). That’s a lot of people for a CW program. As such, it’s already recorded for season 2.

Second, lead actor and executive producer Jared Padalecki has apparently also asked for – and received – Chuck Norris’ blessing (see video below). So I’m trying to do everything I can to get this show off the ground. I’m stepping back to win. Walker will become a television show, probably for a few seasons. And a whole new generation will grow up believing that the great drunk Padalecki is Cordell Walker, and the image of Chuck Norris will quickly fade from memory.

So I have only one request. Walker, you’d at least make a fucking traffic circle!

CMAU Reviews: The first episode of the Walker reboot (without Chuck Norris).

Chuck Norris approved?

As seen in the Good Morning America video, Padalecki claims to have received the blessing of the great Chuck Norris for the Walker, Texas Ranger reboot. It is not yet clear if this conversation was explored or if a specific topic from the series was discussed. Here are a few questions that arise:

  • Did Chuck Norris know it would be on CW?
  • Did he know he was moving to Austin?
  • Have we discussed the character changes?
  • Did Jared tell Chuck that Walker’s father is bald and named Bonham?
  • We told Chuck that the new walker would never happen to anyone ever?

I’m assuming that’s probably not the case. I imagine Chuck is very proud of Walker, Texas Ranger and the success it has brought him and his family, but I’m willing to assume that he probably doesn’t want to get into the details of how the show might be revived or reinvented.

However, this little interview says a lot about what Padalecki seems to think of Chuck and the original series. It seems like a bit of a joke that the GMA hosts even extend a hand to Chuck, and while Padalecki doesn’t go that far, he doesn’t seem to be a huge fan of the original series or anything.

Everything is wrong with “Walker – Episode 2: Back in the Saddle”.

Not your parents’ Walker, Texas Ranger.


I’m curious what the difference is between the audience for these two shows. Honestly, the first “Walker, Texas Ranger” always felt like it was aimed at baby boomers over 55, and I imagined it was aimed at people who didn’t live in Texas or the South. The way he handled many of his characters and his script was very “that’s how we do it in Texas, not so funny.”

Walker’s secondary audience, the Texas Ranger, were, of course, the baby boomers who kept reliving the Walker experience, Conan O’Brien’s jokes about “Walker,” the Texas Ranger handle and Chuck Norris. For many of us, however, the category fit perfectly and overall we really enjoyed the show. It’s a perfect blend of quirky storytelling and even more exciting plots that are, dare I say, among the best in television history.

On the other hand, this new series seems clearly aimed at teens and the rest of CW’s core audience. The emphasis is still on melodrama and coming-of-age stories.

Conan’s “Walker, Texas Ranger Lever” story…

Walker Less stupid, I think.

So here we are. Episode 3 of the new Walker and it looks like that’s exactly what we’re going to get. A happy romance between Padalecki and his real wife/fictional deceased wife, a family drama in seventh heaven (x2 because we have kids and grandparents) and very little fighting or action.

Walker is also apparently a Texas Rangers fan. Which is funny because… you know, the Texas Rangers. It’s also weird because they’re no longer in Dallas/Ft. Worth, but in Austin, which is closer to Houston, so he could also be an Astros fan. But either way.

Walker drinks less in this episode. He does a little more Ranger work. He also has a comedic “adopted” brother named Hoyt Rawlins (played by Matt Barr, better known from Hatfields and McCoys and other CW series). Ranger Ramirez’s character develops a bit more. Walker’s kids have more problems. And all goes well in the end.

But, uh… no rotunda. A quick firefight. But, uh, no. Not a single shot. Sigh.

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